The creative outlet of Anthony Munkholm: thanks for reading

Healing through my words:

Life doesn't give you the people you want,
it gives you the people you need:
to love you, to hate you, to make you, to break you, & to make you the person you were meant to be. -unknown

Love can and will come to those who still believe in it. Hope is the key. Even when faced with disappointment love will still find a way. Even after betrayal love will still knock on your door. Love will come to those who have been hurt before. I will never give up on love. I will even love those who no longer love me. Love is all there is and all there ever will be. -me

I believe I have been given an opportunity to share my successes and my struggles, my up's and my down's, the good and the bad with those who find their way to my blog. I feel I have been given a gift to write. I feel in my heart part of my gift to the world comes through my words. My greatest joy comes through expressing myself here. I write for myself but I feel compelled to share it with you too. I believe in love, compassion, and understanding which I share here.

Saturday, February 11, 2012

Cannot help it. God knows I try...

I am finding myself lost in sorrow right now,
I am finding myself regretting the past again,
No one ever told me it was going to be this hard,
No one ever told me it would hurt so much,

The nights are no longer my enemy but at times the days are still longer then I care for,
there is still love there,
there is still pain there,
she is still there

Is it because I held my emotions in for so long,
I feel like I am destined to keep repeating this pattern because I have yet to embrace all the gifts that come with this struggle,
I can write them here in words,
I can conceive them in my mind,
but here I am again,

i know i am not alone but
no one knows how I feel,
heads may be nodding as they read through this but I miss her,
God I fucking miss her...

Wishing I had the right words, the right actions,
but the pain just builds because I know the wall is too high to get over,
I can keep reaching
but my arms will merely fall by my sides as they grow tired

My words mean so much to me,
each one a precious gift,
it hurts that my words mean so much to me and yet she
can simply brush them away like trash on the street,

some will tell me that it is best to walk away,
and i know they are right,
i know it is time,
and yet every time I look over my shoulder there is still only one face that I wish was staring back at me,
only one i want in my arms,
only one i want in my heart,

why is it so hard to do and so easy to say,
i am trying to set you free,
i am trying to release you,
i want to open up this lock on my heart
but there is such a part of me that does not want to give you the key...

1 comment:

  1. I know the last thing you want to hear is a pat answer so I will not give it to you but I will say this, one day at a time my son, one day at a time. Love you,Dad